Traditions

At the end of Daniel’s graduation, I was a little envious of the Polynesian culture that was adorning their graduate with leis. I was envious of the traditions and strong sense of family that they had.

I have been thinking over the past several months what are my traditions and my heritage and what legacy will I leave behind?

And one day it hit me.  I was reading Alma 9:8 …have ye forgotten the traditions of your fathers;” What traditions had I forgotten, what legacy was I missing; then I remembered.

Family “traditions” come and go. Think of the ones that we have or had, 21^st party, Halloween donuts, Valentine’s Day dinner, Fun Friday nights, pizza Friday. But there is one tradition that has never changed and it has been carried down through many generations even before the church was around.  The tradition that we have that has been passed down from generation to generation, and I will pass on as my legacy to all of you is love for God love for family and love for our fellow men. 

As we love and serve each other and those around us we will learn gratitude. We will positive and supportive of each other as we share eternal experiences. Bring a little light into the world.

I hope that this motto is written on your hearts.  This is our family tradition; this is who the Little’s are.

Sister Bateman shared this quote in class a couple of months ago

“Be true to who you are and the family name you bare”.

As you all grow up and move out will you carry on the tradition; will you love and serve, will you be positive and supportive to each other as you share eternal experiences, will you bring a little light into the world?

Love mom

Friends

Sorry that I have not shared a mom moment in quite some time, but I needed to take some time.

I have been trying to think of something that would pertain to all of you since each one of you are on a different journey and struggling with different things.

Thru out our lives we come into contact with a lot of people and we make friends with a lot of people.  Looking back on my life I have been blessed with friends that have helped me become the person I am today.  I have friends that have showed me how to have courage, to be a leader, to show kindness, how to show support to others.  I have had friends that have encouraged me, strengthen me, helped my faith grow, and supported me in difficult times.

We need to be aware of the people we surround ourselves with. Do those that you associate with help you achieve the person you want to be, will they help you achieve your potential. Will they help you achieve the goals you have set for yourself, will their friendship make you a better person in the end, when you leave their presence do you feel buoyed up and strengthened.

Take some time and reflect on these questions and answer them truthfully to yourself, if the answer is no or not really may I suggest that you find some additional friends.  Notice I said additional we don’t need to leave our current friends unless they are have a negative effect on our lives, but we should have some friends that we can say yes to all of these questions. 

Friends play an important role in our lives and help feel in the gaps where family cannot.  I urge to find good friends and good associations that will bless your life for the better and help you become a better person.

If you are a quote person here are some quotes about friends:

Many people walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints on your heart-Eleanor  Roosevelt

Good friends help you find the important things when you have lost them… your smile, your hope and your courage

True friend are those rare people who come find you in dark places and lead you back to the light.

If you are song person here is a great song on friends- Gift of a Friend https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&ved=0ahUKEwjssbLtq-zUAhXp6YMKHQYuBbMQyCkIKTAA&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D8Xevi6KRvGc&usg=AFQjCNHfR-Sqde09zxewnSzRf05yVGRWdw

I hope that you all know that dad and I are happy and willing to be your friend. We will help you with your dreams, be there for your highs and your lows, when you are feeling alone, you’re not alone for we are here for you.

Know that we care and love each of you.

Love mom

Remeber

Remember is one of the most important words.

This week I went to spend some time with my family in St. George.  Grandma Blake and I were walking to our car after swimming and in the grassy field there was a family flying a kite and I had a flash back to when I was a kid. I remembered that my mom would buy us a kite every to spring to fly.  This year our kite was a black triangle with a white triangle flap where the string clung too. This is the year I learned to fly a kite.  I am amazed at the simple-ness of flying a kite but it’s a difficult thing to do. And with that memory also came my mom’s life lessons. Grandma is an amazing woman and has a life analogy for every experience.

With the word remember we can remember where we came from, we can remember why we are here, we can remember our end goal.

We can remember our family legacy. I talked to Grandpa Blake this week and we were talking about family history.  The family history library has produced a family geneology chart and from one ancestor there are 3 descendants, 1 line of descendants are most of the church leaders, on the 2 line there are most of the American leadership, and on the third line which is our line are average people that are anchors in the community and Church.  Remember that is your legacy to be an anchor.  Anchors are used in storms to help the boat from moving. The anchor sits at the bottom of the ocean alone but knows that the captain is in charge and knows that the captain will not forget him.

Remember I WILL ALWAYS BE YOUR ANCHOR to your boat and the calm in your storm.

You can remember your moms’ great love for you.  You can remember all the sacrifices that she has made for you.  You can remember that she know who each of you are meant to be.

Each of you chose your name and whispered it to me before you were born.  Each of you chose your name because you wanted to remember something in this mortal life.  And I know why each of you chose your name.  And if ever you’re interested in finding out what you wanted to remember; you can it in my red journal on page 562. You don’t need to ask permission to read it just do it.  All of my journals are for you all to read.

Remember I love you and God loves you.

Leave your heart open to remembering.

The Dash

by Linda Ellis copyright 1996

​I read of a man who stood to speak

at the funeral of a friend.

He referred to the dates on the tombstone

from the beginning…to the end.

He noted that first came the date of birth

and spoke the following date with tears,

but he said what mattered most of all

was the dash between those years.

For that dash represents all the time

that they spent alive on earth.

And now only those who loved them

know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not, how much we own,

the cars…the house…the cash.

What matters is how we live and love

and how we spend our dash.

So, think about this long and hard.

Are there things you’d like to change?

For you never know how much time is left

that can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough

to consider what’s true and real

and always try to understand

​the way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger

and show appreciation more

and love the people in our lives

like we’ve never loved before. 

If we treat each other with respect

and more often wear a smile,

remembering that this special dash

might only last a little while.

​So, when your eulogy is being read,

with your life’s actions to rehash…

would you be proud of the things they say

about how you spent YOUR dash?

​​Copyright 1996 Linda Ellis

This poem was read at the beginning of my grandma Pendletons funeral in 2001. As you know my grandma’s funeral was a turning point in my life.  I really pondered “what do I want people to say about me when I die.” What do I want my kids to say about me when I die” And I changed my life, I stopped focusing on the material things that I thought were important and went to work on the real important things, relationships with people and Heavenly Father.

Be aware that people are always watching you, and your dash is always being defined.

  

   Each life that touches ours for good
Reflects thine own great mercy, Lord;
Thou sendest blessings from above
Thru words and deeds of those who love.

   What greater gift dost thou bestow,
What greater goodness can we know
Than Christlike friends, whose gentle ways
Strengthen our faith, enrich our days.

  When such a friend from us departs,
We hold forever in our hearts
A sweet and hallowed memory,
Bringing us nearer, Lord, to thee.

   For worthy friends whose lives proclaim

I also like this song I really have been pondering the first line” Each life that touches ours for Good.  Think of the lives that have touched your life; family, friends, leaders, teachers, the news, song artists, the prophet that wrote scripture, ancestors that came to America…etc.  We are not lone islands and it is silly for us to think that our actions have no consequences and that our actions don’t affect anyone else, because they do.

 Take time to ponder if you were to die in one year from now, which is possible we don’t know when we will leave this world, Ponder what do you want people to say about you, what will your dash mean to others. 

How can you touch others life for good?

Scatter Sunshine

 

In a world where sorrow

Ever will be known,

Where are found the needy

And the sad and lone,

How much joy and comfort

You can all bestow,

If you scatter sunshine

Ev’rywhere you go.

(Chorus)

Scatter sunshine all along your way.

Cheer and bless and brighten

Ev’ry passing day.

Scatter sunshine all along your way.

Cheer and bless and brighten

Ev’ry passing day.

 Slightest actions often

Meet the sorest needs,

For the world wants daily

Little kindly deeds.

Oh, what care and sorrow

You may help remove,

With your songs and courage,

Sympathy and love.

 When the days are gloomy,

Sing some happy song;

Meet the world’s repining

With a courage strong.

Go with faith undaunted

Thru the ills of life;

Scatter smiles and sunshine

O’er its toil and strife

I have been thinking a lot lately about the gospel and its principles.  I think that we get caught up in things and forget the true gospel.  The Savior spent his ministery serving as many people as he possible could.

We should be doing the same thing.  Yes we do have homework, chores, jobs, church callings and family and friend responsibilities.  But throughout the day you could be "scattering sunshine" as you do all of these things.

Hold the door open for the people behind you, smile, speak kinder, wish everyone a good day. When I think i remember to pray that I can see those around be that could use help, I see tons a people that I can help: Help the elderly find their cars, and loading their groceries, helping them get the higher stuff off the shelves.  Letting the mom with sad kids in front of me in line, Saying hi to the neighbors.  The list could go on and on. But when I take the few minutes to help it makes my day brighter as well.

I would council all of you to take 20 - 30 min out of your "busy" schedules and serve.  Your day will go better.

Matt 5:16- Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in Heaven.

If you want some ideas on what you can do to scatter sunshine here is a link of some ideas

1. Scatter Sun Shine
2. 
   

Am I Being a Bully

What is a bully?

 A bully is a person who uses strength or power to harm or intimidate those who are weaker. 

 Are you unintentionally bullying someone?  

Be aware of the things that you say to others, are they things would harm them emotionally, spiritually, weaken their confidence, or their inner strength.

What about your tone of voice it can be a weapon as well.  Is your tone of voice demeaning, full of irritation, is your tone of voice making someone else uncomfortable?

If so you may be a bully without if recognizing it.

Are you bullying yourself?

Do you put yourself down saying I am not good at......, Do you focus on your weakness instead of your strengths. Do you compare your weakness to others strengths, Do you compare your situation to others situations and think you'll never measure up.  Are with holding from yourself.  Is your inner conversation  condemning; I wish I was skinnier, taller, stronger, smarter,  I hate this about me, I hate the way I look.

If you said yes to any of these then you are bullying yourself.

It is time to put an end to the bullying in whatever form you are struggling with.

 When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following:

Stop it!


It’s that simple. We simply have to stop judging others (And ourselves) and replace judgmental thoughts and feelings with a heart full of love.(Towards yourself and towards others) Pres. Utchdorf. and inserts for mom.

Be kinder to yourself and to others

Learn to love yourself.  Focus on those things that you like about yourself.  Focus on those talents that you have been given. And continue to develop new talents, but don't compare your progress towards others. Change your inner dialog from I wish, I hate, I am not- to  I love, I enjoy, I am.  Each of you are awesome in your own ways.  I have helped all of you develop many qualities and talents. So if you can't see the good in yourself here are a few things I notice. 

Chris-Compassionate, considerate,  is good at studying out in his mind, can fix most things and make most things. Stands up for good and others agency.  Loves music, is good composing sings well. Loyal, natural leader  

Daniel- is good at music, dancing,sings well, reading,draws, has great study skills.  Loves unconditionally, sees the good in others at all times, loyal, natural leader. is Steadfast, peacemaker (hates conflict)

Kaitlyn- is my right arm at the moment, she is great at organizing, and organizing others, a natural leader, is a friend to all. is growing in your piano skills quite rapidly, loves singing, dancing, has compassion, 

Samantha- Quietly observes the world around her before she acts, she draws, great at decorating, reminds her parents to have fun, developing her piano skills quickly, is learning to be a leader.

Please remember for the most part people are just doing the best that they can with what they have been taught, give them the benefit of doubt before you put them down or demean them. Never speak negative about someone.  I have taught you all better than that.  There is good in most all people, look for it! And then focus on that.

Love mom

Joy!

What is Joy?  

Peter Kreeft a Christian philosopher said, " Joy is more than Happiness, just as happiness is more than pleasure.  Pleasure is in the body.  Happiness is in the mind and feelings. Joy is deep in the heart of the spirit, the center of the self.

I came across this song as I was studying joy and what it means.

I found it on a day when I was feeling rather hopeless.  As I was looking around at the world wondering if my children and my grandchildren will have a chance to find joy and peace in a world that is in chaos and commotion.

As I watched this video and listened to this song a few phrases stood out to me.

"Make peace with yourself-

Let's stick together

Nothing really matters, we have everything that we need

Take a big leap and jump right over 

I think joy can be found by remembering these key phrases.

Do what you need to do to truly find peace with in yourself. Do you need to forgive someone, do you need to apologies to someone, do you need to change a habit, do you need to be kinder to yourself.

Nothing really matters, we have everything we need

This is so true. We do have everything that we need to have joy.  We have a great family and we like each other and we like to be with each other.  We have the knowledge that we are an eternal family. We have beautiful surrounds. We have beautiful mountains and rivers,  beautiful sunrises and sunsets, we have beautiful clouds, and some days we have the bluest skies.  We have our talents that we can share with others, we have a gospel that brings us hope and peace. 

Also the phrase "stick together"  There is joy in relationships.  You can't find true joy when you are focused on yourself. Joy comes from looking through out the day to help others.  I have a better day when I ask the Lord to bless my eyes to be open that I may see those that can use a little help.  

The last phrase that stood out to me is "take a big leap and jump right over". Joy is a choice, it doesn't just happen.  

My life changed when Pres. Monson gave the talk Finding Joy in the Journey. One phrase stood out to me and it has shaped my life:

 "This is our one and only chance at mortal life—here and now. The longer we live, the greater is our realization that it is brief. Opportunities come, and then they are gone. I believe that among the greatest lessons we are to learn in this short sojourn upon the earth are lessons that help us distinguish between what is important and what is not. I plead with you not to let those most important things pass you by as you plan for that illusive and nonexistent future when you will have time to do all that you want to do. Instead, find joy in the journey—now.

I learned from this one phrase that this my one shot at mortality and I don't know how long my mortality will be. I could be gone tomorrow for all I know.  But when I die I want to be able to look back on my mortal life and say I lived life to the fullest and found joy in each day and in each moment. 

2 Nephi 2:25-Men are, that they might have joy

Choose Joy!

Love mom