Be Your Own Kind Of Wonderful

For some reason about this time every year I take inventory of my life and look at all the things that I fall short at; and have a pity party that I’m not good enough.

 I was whining to my husband about all the things that I am not good enough at and telling him all the things that I fall short at.  When he asked, “Why is it that women spend energy worrying about the things that they fall short at, why can’t you focus on the things that you are good at?”  Basically he told me, “ Charissa be your own kind of wonderful.  You have your own talents that God gave you and you use them for good.  Don’t focus on the talents that you don’t have.”

My wise husband shared the story of the painter Vincent Van Gough, how he never thought that he was a great painter.  The paintings that he thought were of value he gave away, and those paintings that he thought he failed at he hung in his house.  That’s probably why he went crazy; he chose to keep the paintings that he thought were failures close to him instead of focusing on his master pieces.

My husband pointed out that I have great talents and I love sharing them with others.  So what if I am not the best house keeper, or the most organized person, or can’t give eloquent lessons, or  my house isn’t  cutely decorated, and of course I don’t write well. My husband reminded me to look at my “masterpieces “ and find joy in the talents that I do have, and be patient with myself  with the talents I’m developing.

James E. Faust Said, The Lord entrusts all of His servants, with talents. The Lord, who endows us with these talents, tells us: “I believe you can. I believe you can.” While we are not all equal in experience, aptitude, and strength, we have different opportunities to employ these gifts, and we will all be accountable for the use of the gifts and opportunities given to us. ( OCTOBER 2002 I BELIEVE I CAN, I KNEWI COULD)

I hope as you go about your week that you will focus on your "masterpieces" and find joy in them, and be patient with yourself and find joy in the journey as you strengthen your other talents.

Are you Burdened Down?

Life has been weighing me down this week.  Every day I had a lot that I needed to accomplish and I have a lot to accomplish in the near future, and I might be at my breaking point.  Because of this I have had a heavy heart, a distracted mind and I have not been mentally with my family because I am worrying about the hundred things that are going to be coming at me.  Does anyone else feel this way? And honestly I didn't know that this was how I felt until yesterday, I was in a Relief Society* Presidency meeting when my dear friend said our opening prayer and it went something like this, “Father we come to thee burdened downed”.  Not until then did I realize that this is how I was feeling, and the tears flowed freely.  I finally recognized that I was feeling a heavy burden.

 In Mathew 11:28-30 we read,

 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

This scripture is me. I am laboring with all my might, and I am very heavy laden.  But did I come unto Christ as the scripture said?  No, I haven’t.  Not once this week did I say in my prayers, “I am feeling burdened with all that I have going on in my life, can you help me with my burden?”  No, all I prayed for was that I would make it through the day.  But He promised something better than just making it through the day.

               

                In verse 29 and 30 it reads:  Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

A yoke is a harness that goes between two oxen.  It is usually made of wood so that it cannot flex, so that one ox cannot get ahead of the other.  The yoke makes it so that they must be side by side so that they can pull the burden equally.

                If Christ is saying take my yoke upon you, is He not saying keep me right next to you so that I can help you carry your burden.

                How do we yoke Christ next us?  It tells us in the very next sentence. I have never noticed until just now.  LEARN OF ME. What? I am burdened down with all that I have to do and Christ wants me to take time to learn of Him. He wants me to take time to read my scriptures, pray, and do things in my life that will bring me closer to Him. I am too busy; why should I? 

Why should I take the time in my busy life to learn about Christ?  Because I want the promise that follows, “and ye shall find rest unto your soul.” Isn’t that what I want, to feel peace; I don’t want to feel burdened by all that I need to do.  I want to feel peace.

But aren’t reading my scriptures and praying just more things to add to my burden?  Christ answers that question in verse 30:

For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

He just told us that His burden is light. His burden – doing those things in our lives that will bring us closer to Him – does not add to our load.

Mosiah 24:15  And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord.

So this week I am planning on praying that the Lord will help me bare my burden, and Learn more of Christ, so that I can feel peace. 

If you find yourself feeling burdened I would urge you to join me in Coming unto Christ, and then share with me your experience.

*Relief Society is an organization of women from ages 18 and up in the Church of Jesus Chris of Latter Day Saints. This organization has a president, two counselors, and a secretary.

Happy Birthday Grandma

Happy Birthday Grandma!!!Today is my grandma’s birthday, and in honor of her memory I made Caramel Corn Pops. My grandma would make this for picnics and lazy summer evening.  I really miss her.  Grandma loved to cook, we went to her house every Sunday and she would have dessert for us.  She also always had homemade cookies waiting for us whenever we would pop in for a visit during the week.  My grandma was amazing.  I have so many great memories of her.

Grandma passed away back in January of 2001.

Grandma Delores was the perfect grandma.  The most important thing to her was our grandpa, and the next important thing to her was her family.  Grandma was a woman of service.  She was always cooking for someone, always crocheting something for someone, or doing something for someone. Grandma always made everyone feel that they were special to her.

Grandma took really good care of me when I was in elementary school.  My parents struggled finacially while I was growing up.  Grandma made sure I had a new dress for special occasions, new clothes for school and every summer she would let me come stay at her house for a week.

Grandma left us with many family traditions that we still celebrate with our families today.  Pizza for Christmas Eve, Christmas parties with hors d' oeuvres, homemade spudnuts for Halloween, and sugar cookies for every holiday.

Because of Grandma Delores’s example I am the person I am today. At grandmas funeral one of her children spoke about how she loved others and that she emulated the Savior.  That’s what I want others to be able to say about me.  I often find myself wondering  “what would grandma do?”

The last ten year of grandma’s life she was bedridden , I know that it was very frustrating for her, but she bore her trail with grace, patients and never wondering why me.

In proverbs 31 talks about the kind of woman Grandma Delores was.

10 ¶Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

 11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

 28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

 29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

 30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

 31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

When grandma Delores passed away in 2001 she left a hole in everyone’s heart that knew her. But because I knew her I am better person today, and even in death she makes a difference in my life.  I look forward to seeing her again.  Love you Grandma, Happy Birthday.

For the recipe for corn pops you can find it on my other blog Little Delights Cafe

What have I done today?

I certainly can relate to this message, I don’t know about you, but I have had some of those days. There are those days when my list seems to get longer and longer, and the people around me are in  need  of my help and I just feel frustrated and want to yell “what about me, when is it my turn?”

 What I love most about this message is that we get to see what effect that her influence and service had on others.  Most of the times we never get to see the outcome of our influence and service to others. And most of the time we don’t take the time to stop and realize what we have done, we just look at what we didn't accomplish, or we are just focused on what we want to do most.

This is one of my favorite hymns, I do find myself singing this hymn when I have had days like is illustrated in this clip.  It sometimes helps me have perspective.

Have I done any good in the world today?

Have I helped anyone in need?

Have I cheered up the sad and made someone feel glad?

If not, I have failed indeed.

Has anyone’s burden been lighter today

Because I was willing to share?

Have the sick and the weary been helped on their way?

When they needed my help was I there?

This is posted as the tag line for this clip; I think it will be going on my bathroom mirror for a while.

“How many things did you get checked off your “to- do” list today? Sometimes, the most important things you do each day were never even on your list. As we help a neighbor or family member, we often overlook the results. You might worry about the things you never get done, but President Gordon B. Hinckley reminds us, “You never know how much good you do.”

Let us remember the words which King Benjamin taught us “And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God.” Mosiah 2:17.  (in the Book of Mormon)

Have a fabulous day and go and do something good today!!

Forgivng is a Beautiful Thing

Every day we are faced with the challenge of forgiving those around us.  Throughout the day small incidental things occur and we forgive without even thinking about it, and sometimes we have real hurtful things that happen to us, and we have to dig deep to  forgive.

Forgiving others can be challenging thing to do sometimes.  In the New Testament, Matt. 18:21-22 it reads:  Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?

 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

Jesus isn’t really giving us a number on how many times we should forgive someone, but he his telling us that we must always forgive, because he has forgiven everyone that asked for forgiveness.

In Doctrine and Covenants 64:9-10 it reads:

 Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin.

 I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men.

Pres. Uchtdorf in April 2012 conference said “Forgiving ourselves and others is not easy. In fact, for most of us it requires a major change in our attitude and way of thinking—even a change of heart. But there is good news. This “mighty change” of heart is exactly what the gospel of Jesus Christ is designed to bring into our lives. How is it done? Through the love of God.

When our hearts are filled with the love of God, something good and pure happens to us. We “keep his commandments: and his commandments are not grievous. For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world.”

The more we allow the love of God to govern our minds and emotions—the more we allow our love for our Heavenly Father to swell within our hearts—the easier it is to love others with the pure love of Christ. As we open our hearts to the glowing dawn of the love of God, the darkness and cold of animosity and envy will eventually fade.

As always, Christ is our exemplar. In His teachings as in His life, He showed us the way. He forgave the wicked, the vulgar, and those who sought to hurt and to do Him harm.

Jesus said it is easy to love those who love us; even the wicked can do that. But Jesus Christ taught a higher law. His words echo through the centuries and are meant for us today. They are meant for all who desire to be His disciples. They are meant for you and me: “Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.”

When our hearts are filled with the love of God, we become “kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving [each other], even as God for Christ’s sake [forgave us].”  end quote.

I have had my own opportunities to learn to forgive, when I was in my teens I was molested.  I have had to learn to forgive this person for the hurt that he had caused me.  And has I have forgiven this person the pain has gone away.  It’s been almost 20 years and I hardly think of it.

I have many more examples of forgiving other, but this one incident affected my life in many ways.

I am grateful for my Savior and His infinite atonement that can allow me to forgive others and at the same time heal my pain.

You probably want to know how I could forgive someone of an awful thing, I did as President Uchtdorf said, “This topic of judging others could actually be taught in a two-word sermon. When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following:

Stop it!

It’s that simple. We simply have to stop judging others and replace judgmental thoughts and feelings with a heart full of love for God and His children. God is our Father. We are His children. We are all brothers and sisters. I don’t know exactly how to articulate this point of not judging others with sufficient eloquence, passion, and persuasion to make it stick. I can quote scripture, I can try to expound doctrine, and I will even quote a bumper sticker I recently saw. It was attached to the back of a car whose driver appeared to be a little rough around the edges, but the words on the sticker taught an insightful lesson. It read, “Don’t judge me because I sin differently than you.”

We must recognize that we are all imperfect—that we are beggars before God. Haven’t we all, at one time or another, meekly approached the mercy seat and pleaded for grace? Haven’t we wished with all the energy of our souls for mercy—to be forgiven for the mistakes we have made and the sins we have committed?

Because we all depend on the mercy of God, how can we deny to others any measure of the grace we so desperately desire for ourselves? My beloved brothers and sisters, should we not forgive as we wish to be forgiven?

Yes I had to do what Pres. Uchtdorf said and stop it.  I had to make the choice to stop thinking about being molested and I had to stop letting it affect my life.  I had a choice, to be unhappy or happy, I choose to be happy and forgive.

I hope that you will make the choice, choose to be happy and forgive.  It is hard but through the atonement of the Savior all things are possible.

Happy Mother's Day

This is my mom, she has taught me so much. Love you mom.

I love being a mom.  I remember growing up and all my friends saying when I grow up I want to be…a teacher, a nurse, a doctor, a vet…etc.  But all I ever wanted to be was a mom; I never wanted to be anything else.  I am grateful every day to be able to stay at home and be a mom.

It not always easy to be a mom, I remember the days when my kids were young and the days just seemed to blend together.  It was the same tasks day after day and the same phrases day after day.  Wipe noses, change diapers, feed kids, plan an activity, and fix meals, clean house, and grocery shop.   And somewhere in between teach: be nice, say thank you, say please, help mommy clean up, be mommies super helper, use your words not your hands.

Now my kids are older and my oldest son is about to leave on a mission for two years for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and I am so grateful for those days that I got to share with him and the rest of my kids.  They are growing up so quickly. I love being a mom!

You can recognize women who are grateful to be a daughter of God by their reverence for motherhood, even when that blessing has been withheld from them for a time. In those circumstances, their righteous influence can be a blessing in the lives of children they love. Their exemplary teachings can echo the voice of a faithful home and resonate truth in the hearts of children who need another witness.

Grateful daughters of God love Him and teach their children to love Him without reservation and without resentment. They are like the mothers of Helaman’s youthful army, who had such great faith and “had been taught by their mothers, that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them” (Alma 56:47).

When you observe kind and gentle mothers in action, you see women of great strength. Their families can feel a spirit of love and respect and safety when they are near her as she seeks the companionship of the Holy Ghost and the guidance of His Spirit. They are blessed by her wisdom and good judgment. The husbands and children, whose lives they bless, will contribute to the stability of societies all over this world. Grateful daughters of God learn truths from their mothers and grandmothers and aunts. They teach their daughters the joyful art of creating a home. They seek fine educations for their children and have a thirst for knowledge themselves. They help their children develop skills that they can use in serving others. They know that the way they have chosen is not the easy way, but they know it is absolutely worth their finest efforts.

They understand what Elder Neal A. Maxwell meant when he said: “When the real history of mankind is fully disclosed, will it feature the echoes of gunfire or the shaping sound of lullabies? The great armistices made by military men or the peacemaking of women in homes and in neighborhoods? Will what happened in cradles and kitchens prove to be more controlling than what happened in congresses?”

Daughters of God know that it is the nurturing nature of women that can bring everlasting blessings, and they live to cultivate this divine attribute. Surely when a woman reverences motherhood, her children will arise up and call her blessed (see Prov. 31:28) Margaret D. Nadauld, Oct. 2000 General Conference

Happy Mother’s Day!

Families are Forever

I have always had a love for family history, but I have never produced a family file name. However, I have participated in family history in other ways.

When I was young I lived close to both sets of my grandparents and to 3 sets of my great grandparents, and got many opportunities to visit with them on regular basis. I loved to hear them tell stories of when they were younger.

Growing up every summer my family would go to one of two family reunions, there I also loved to listen to my great aunts and uncles and older cousins tell family stories.  You can learn a lot when you sit and listen to others tell their stories.  Also through these family reunions I got to know my second and third cousins and we became good friends.  

Elder Nielson said “We have a natural yearning to connect with our ancestors. When our hearts turn to our ancestors, something changes inside us.  We feel a part of something greater than ourselves.  Our inborn yearnings for family connections are fulfilled when we are linked to our ancestors…” end quote

When I turned twelve I had a great aunt who was very involved in researching family names and getting them ready for the temple.  I would go to the St. George temple with my dad, siblings, and cousins every other Saturday for four years to do baptisms for our ancestors.  We did thousands of names.  I gained several things from this experience.

First – I learned that my dad had a testimony of temple work and that he believed that families are forever.

Second- As I would stand in the font and be baptized for hundreds of ancestors over the years I could feel the excitement of those I was being baptized for.   I gained my own testimony of temple work and that families are forever. 

Third- It got me in the habit of regularly attending the temple and that has carried with me into my adult life.

Another way that I have been able to participate in family history is by reading stories of my ancestors. I’m lucky enough that when I google the name of one of my ancestors I can usually find a brief history and a picture of them. By reading their stories of conversion and the sacrifices that they made so that I can have the gospel it causes me to have the desire to keep my covenants and to continue to press forward with faith.  I do not want to be the weak link in my family chain.

 Elder Haight said “I would hope and pray that in our own families, all of us, that we would have a desire to be a strong link in our own family chain, in our posterity, so that the eternal blessings that are part of the gospel, the blessings of the temple and the eternities, will be taught to our families in such a way that they will go on and on forever to affect many, many people. Be sure that those links are strong in your chain and that you pass the testimony that you have, the devotion that you have to future generations.” End quote.

Then, last October with the push to do temple work, my son Christopher was able to find close to 200 names for our family to do.  I am grateful for the opportunity to once again to do family names.  I love performing the scared temple work for my ancestors. I am grateful for the peace I feel to that comes with the knowledge that I am linking my family together through the eternities. Elder Christofferson said “The vicarious ordinances we perform in temples, beginning with baptism, make possible an eternal welding link between generations that fulfills the purpose of the earth’s creation. Without this, “the whole earth would be utterly wasted at [Christ’s] coming.” Close quote.

On lds.org it list nine ways that we can participate in Family history and I added a few extra.

Interview family members, write and share their stories

Take and share photos                 

Prepare names to take to the temple

Indexing

Start a family blog

Create a digital scrap book of your ancestors

Create a scrap book for yourself and for your family

Plan and attend Family reunions

Learn the stories of your ancestors

Print your family fan chart

Help others with their family history whether it’s by teaching them to search names or helping them with temple work

Journaling.

Elder Cook in this last conference said “The doctrine of the family in relation to family history and temple work is clear. The Lord in initial revelatory instructions referred to “baptism for your dead.” Our doctrinal obligation is to our own ancestors. This is because the celestial organization of heaven is based on families. The First Presidency has encouraged members, especially youth and young single adults, to emphasize family history work and ordinances for their own family… We need to be connected to both our roots and branches… Don’t underestimate the influence of the deceased in assisting your efforts and the joy of ultimately meeting those you serve. The eternally significant blessing of uniting our own families is almost beyond comprehension.

Elder Bednar and Elder Scott have promised the following blessings you can receive if you will participate in Family History.

Your conversion to the Savior will become deeper

You will receive light and knowledge through the Holy Ghost

Your testimonies will be strengthened

Your patriarchal blessing will become more meaningful

Your Love and gratitude for your ancestors will grow

You will receive greater opportunities to serve

And your Service in the temple will become more sacred.

I can testify that these promises are true, for I have received or have felt each of these blessing in my life as I have participated in family history throughout my life. I would like to bare my testimony that I know that our Savior lives, and I am grateful for my knowledge that families are forever.   In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.